Okay, I thought I'd ask you fine forum people for opinions on this question, trying to tie up a loose thread on my novel.

My main character is a Princess of a nation spanning most of North America, (the second-born daughter, which is sort of important,) and during the course of the book she's been captured by Rebels, escaped (or been allowed to escape, perhaps,) and travelled incognito for a few days with her few friends, because she wasn't sure who to trust or if people would even believe her real identity.

After the climax, she is questioned by Royal guards in a fairly large city, and recognizing her opportunity, (also too tired to keep fake stories straight anymore,) she tells them who she is. The thing is, she doesn't have any proof handy at that point - she had her hair chopped off to avoid looking too much like a naive society girl, is wearing stolen clothing that fits a boy, and lost the last of her fine jewelry in a train crash.

When I was writing, I just sort of had the guards go 'okay, okay, we believe you' at a nearly random moment during her interruptions, but the beta-reader pointed out that this doesn't really seem credible. So - I'm open to random ideas here. What do you all think?

I think that I'm open to the possibility of making it a much longer scene or sequence, with nobody believing her for a while. Any suggestions or thoughts?

Thanks in advance.

Is it important to the story that the guards do not believe her? If not I'd go the Roman Holiday route: If it's an open secret that the princess is missing, guards will kick new information up the hierarchy pretty quickly.

Quote:

Okay, that fits. I've actually done some work on that sequence today, because I didn't really feel like waiting until I got a reply. So...

- It's not even an open secret that she's missing, more like an official all points bulletin, by the time she gets to the city. Which means that it's a possibility that some random girl who sort of looks like the princess might claim to be her just for a crank.
- I didn't mention this, but one of the Princess' companions was her bodyguard, taken prisoner with her, and he was shot in the big climax. So I said that he still has identification as Security staff at the Royal Castle, which would tend to lend some credence to the Princess' claim.
- They end up taking her to the Estate of the Royal Envoy, who knows the royal family, though she hasn't seen the Princess since she was considerably younger. But she recognizes her anyway, and that's what counts.

Thank you for your reply!

Well, one of the guards who's a deeper thinker than the others could choose between:

Believe her, take her home, and either
a) be rewarded
b) find out she's lying and be laughed at

or

Don't believe her, treat her badly, chuck her out on the street, and either
a) nothing happens, because she was lying
b) she IS the princess and when she gets home she's going to tell her dad about the guards who treated her so badly.

I'd go for the take a chace on her telling the truth if I was him!